First Move

Most of the parents in the park are mothers. That’s not anti-feminist or gender biased but a fact. A dad at the playground with his children is a minority.

There is one dad who I see frequently and I find him recognizable because he is at the park frequently and he is highly unkempt. I see him with his shaggy light brown hair in his eyes, poor posture and lanky figure and wonder what woman would want to bare his children, let alone trust him with the kids. I know it’s terrible how I judge people, but I find him so slouchy and unappealing.

Imagine my surprise to discover he not only sends his girls to the same school as my daughter but is also on the PTA, and is in fact the secretary. He had to chose the most emasculating titled position. I’m still weirded out by him. I just want to see him showered and groomed.

On the upside, I’ve met a dad I do not find even remotely attractive.

The other day I had the luxury of sitting in a coffee shop with my laptop looking out the window. Who should pass the window but Dirty Dad. A moment after we made eye contact I offered a smile which was quickly returned.

I’m slightly ashamed that this was the first time we really had any sort of interaction where we acknowledged the other. Then I began to wonder why he did not initiate the smile. He likely recognized me and did not mistake me as a random smiler. Did he know that I do not shower daily? Or that some mornings I forget to brush my teeth- doesn’t Listerine kill the bad germs? Or that I’ve occasionally conveniently “forgotten” to brush my children’s teeth? Does he know I only like to wash my jeans monthly?

It’s been said that what you love and hate in another person is only a reflection of what you love and hate in yourself. Hmm.


One Response to First Move

  1. Elita says:

    Your conclusion rings very true to me. Although, the reflection may not have to be exactly the same thing in yourself, (e.g.: he has unkept hair and so do you). I applaud you in realizing that what you do see/feel in others triggers something inside of yourself to reconsider. Keep being the honest and honourable mother you are!

    Regina, SK

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